man....eff google maps

what with their street view and all...damn them. on days like these (fridays) i can't stop myself from traversing the l.a. streets and visiting my old haunts. i can't go there in person so i guess pixelated images will have to do. i like checking out all the places i used to party at, where i used to drink coffee, where i used to kick it on the porch with peeps, where i once peed in public....good times man. this blog was going to be about me planning a weekend trip in the not so distant future to the city of Truth or Consequences. the name alone is reason enough to go, at least in my book, and yes there is a book that is mine, and yes, everyone should check it out sometime. what what...that was a long ass-sentence. yes you are reading correctly that sentence came from my ass. the end. man i am just swinging out of control, or rather my emotions are. although i wish i could be literally swinging right now at the park. anywho, onwards and upwards...no no, once again that is applicable for the swings at the park...awww rambling, how i love you so. it really makes the time fly by at work. anywho, the city of T or C is famous for its natural mineral hotsprings. i google street-viewed it and it is quite quaint. i love the idea of driving to this place that's even more godforsaken than the small podunkness that is the town i currently reside in . 505...what what (that's my second what-what of this post, 3rd if you include this one, but who's counting? me). Can everyone see now how i am talk/typing to myself. this is what i feared about the internet, anyone can just post utter nonsense. yes, the internet....truly democratic. anywho, i'm already in T or C in my mind.
i think i figured it out. i quit drinking coffee more than a month ago and today at lunch i got some diet coke, so that caffeine is manifesting itself right now. or i'm just trying to rationalize why i sound like a cray-cray. nope...it's the caffeine. so in book news, i'm re-reading, this time to finish reading, The Brothers Karamazov. the end. i should mos def hit up the library soon though to get some more shit...i like having piles of book that i'm actually interested in reading. i'm really into john irving. i should get the rest of his stuff. the end.
so i netflixed The Peaceful Warrior and was disappointed because the point the movie makes misses the biggest point of the book. has anyone read this. some say it's a cheesy book but i love cheese so it's right up my alley. anywho, this was upsetting in an i-have-nothing-better-to-be-upset-about way.

hmmm...the end for now i think....
the demons have been excorsised.
))<>((

my heart...it feels like bursting

i have this song going through my head right now. it's a song by the aislers set called 'chicago new york. this is the part that is making me want to cry:
"New York was more of the same
'Til somebody mentioned your name
And I broke down and cried
With less than a day to decide
As much as I don't like to fly
I was in the air again
And I never thought I'd care again
And how do I say that I made a mistake
I wanna try, try, try again
I wanna try, try, try again."

belle and sebastian is also running about my head making me sentimental. and all of this
because of one trip to seattle. i just really wish i had never liked that boy because seeing
him with my friend was really really difficult. i know i should be an adult about it and just
be happy for everyone, but it's too fresh. and he doesn't even know...and even if he knew,
what of it, right? i wish i could just be over it. instead here i am typing this shit, trying to swallow the lump in my throat and hoping that my eyes aren't noticeably red because
i'm crying now. okay the end...no more crying and my next post will hopefully have fun stories
about seattle...for now everyone can suck my big fat black balls. i believe that little tidbit is material from the trip....good times